A King’s Lament
I’d be lyin’ if I told you everything was great for me here at Daphne’s Headcovers. Although for the most part, I don’t have any real complaints, there’s just one little thing that gnaws at my nerves. I’ve always seen myself as King of Beasts…King of this here Jungle…kinda’ like Daphne’s own Elvis. Well, almost every animal here respects my lofty position of authority as King—everyone that is, except for that play-acting princess Shih Tzu and that yapping Jack Russell Terrier! When you think about it, our Pride at Daphne’s is a bit unconventional with everything from beavers and beagles living with turtles and triceratops. We all know our places, except of course for the pretend princess and yip yap! I feel it’s my job to protect the pride and be the alpha animal. But when I brush out my mane to its full glory, you can bet the pretend potentate will be flaunting her fur. When I roar to assure my menagerie that they are safe, you can be sure the capper comes from that little Swoop Dog wannabe’s best impression of a yapper! When I’m a bit bothered, however, I focus on the fact that I sit atop the driver in the bag of Ernie Els, one of the top golf professionals in the world. In fact, many of our Daphne’s family members travel the world with the top players in all of golf. I’d like to invite you to put me in your bag, too. Because when you really think about it…you’d be better off with a king like me in your bag. I mean, who wants the yips???


